that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
