Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
