no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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