I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
