its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I just had sex on a roof
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize