Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
