well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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