Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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