Who wears a wallet chain?!
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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