he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
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How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
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Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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