I think I died a long time ago.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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