A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
