remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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