Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize