i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
What did we do last night that was yellow?
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize