What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
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bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
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That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
How does one acquire holy water?
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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