they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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