I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize