Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
