how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize