East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Randomize
