SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want nice things and good sex
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
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