girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
