i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
