you have to choose: penises or morals?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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