I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
