Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize