Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
