Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
