and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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