i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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