You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize