No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just leave with hair like that
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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