I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
