i just google imaged poop.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I licked your asshole in confidence.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
