Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
