We got so high we made milksteak
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
