Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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