According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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