woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
