I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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