i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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