you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
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Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
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I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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