I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
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You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize