I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
My pussy is not your playground.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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