she woke up with a sticky ear
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
