it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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