Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I puked a lego.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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