i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
