Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
